The short life of IT

Katsaridaphobia

- is the fear of cockroaches. 

Thats what I am. Thats what I have. Absolute real fear. As in I'd rather be in a tub full of snakes than be in a room with one cockroach. As in I'd scream my lungs out if I see one. As in an ear-splitting I'm being murdered scream you hear in gore murder movies. As in huge dilated pupils full of fear and a shot of adrenaline interchanging between your heart and brain. As in no sense of logic left. As in having the sudden skill to run like a marathoner and jumping on any chair shelf or table in the speed of light. Even drain. I'd even overcome my fear of jumping over drains.  Don't even talk about flying cockroaches. *nak nangis

This one site I googled said that one of the primary causes of the fear for cockroaches is a more generalized fear of insects. A primary cause of Katsaridaphobia is an initial negative encounter with an insect, specifically a cockroach. This could be as inconsequential as a family members distaste for the bug or an actual incident which inspired anxiety and fear within the phobic person.


I don't remember how it started. But I think it was when I was small. Maybe 4 or 5 years old. You know how you don't remember much during your toddler years except a few excerpts of memory. Well I vividly remember this one. I was showering, the gayung and baldi playing with water kind of fun. And I felt something creepy crawling on my feet and it was a huge lump of roach and I just screamed and ran up the stairs. And I just didn't stop running since. It just escalated as I grew up.

The site also said that the fear can be overcome. A technique called exposure, where the patient is stimulated by the fear and subsequent anxiety. The exposure lasts until their anxiety levels begin to decrease. During this process the patient realizes there is no real justification of the fear and the brain begins to reevaluate the cognitive process.  

OMG ARE THEY INSANE! EXPOSURE! WHAT!!! I KNEW THIS FEAR ABSOLUTELY MAKES SENSE! I MEAN YEAH THEY'RE INSECTS AND THEY SHOULD BE MORE AFRAID BUT THEY'RE NOT! THEY CRAWL ON US WITH THEIR HUGE BROWNISH BLACK ARMOUR AND THEIR PRICKLY CREEPY CRAWLING FEET AND THEY FLY AND THEIR UGHH FACE!!!

On the other hand here are some youtube comments i found which absolutely made sense.

I hope they become extinct someday!!! they're FUCKING GROSS!!
there was this one time while i was with my friends last 2 years when suddenly something 'crackly' went into my pants. i thought it was a candy wrapper but it kept on moving! i realized it was a cockroach and i really screamed like a girl! also a FLYING roach landed on my face while i was sleeping!! ever since then i make sure if a place i'm in has no roaches! xD xD xD xD

I can't stand them...I think it's for two main reasons. 1. They're HUGE. 2. They're FAST. If I see a roach in my room I can't sleep knowing it's there because I'm terrified it will crawl on me at night...>.<

See? Can you imagine that happening.. OMYGODDDD I just can't do it I can't!

Alot of people knew Im dead scared of cockroaches or lipas. Yucks even the name is gross. Lipas. But lots of people initially thought I was medium scared or grossed out and the rest of my reaction was exaggerated girly drama reaction. Well its not. Its real fear. The ones that can make me cry fear. If they're in the room and I don't see them its fine. As long as they quietly go out and die. But once I see them I won't enter the room until its killed.

And I always emerge victorious.

So it so happens that this one roach decided to inhabit my car. MY CAR! A HUGE FULL GROWN ROACH. Not one of those baby roaches. And here is the story of IT.

 Tuesday the 19th of February 2013

 It was late at night. I was driving with Mashi beside me when I saw IT. Crawling over the dashboard. Looking like it owned the place the little creep! There was no car on the road. Screaming and pulling the car to a stop in the middle of the road... I unlocked the car and got out. I just got out and started screaming.

Mashitah was like " No,Najjua listen to me. No. Stop. Najjua!" In the end she drove and I sat at the back quivering. She was quiet and furious. I can tell. " Mashi are you mad at me?" Silence. Then.."You shouldn't jeopardize our safety like that Najjua. Takda orang kot. Anything can happen." I know.. This is KL.. the number of attempted rape, theft, robbery is uncountable. But how can I tell her that even I who was always cautious. Whose neighbour in front got her hand nearly cut by a burglar can't think of safety or logic or anything else when that murderous nightmare is there?" She's my bestfriend. She got the sense of my insensibility. She forgave me. Heh.

The next morning Kak Ju sprayed the whole car with Ridsect and IT didn't show up. So I drove thinking it was dead and gone.

I WAS WRONG.

Thursday the 21st February 2013

Mashi, Boo, Me, Shahrul and Wan decided to watch Beautiful Creatures. Since my car was the nicest :p we decided to jump in my car. All went well. The girls sat at the back and the boys sat at the front. Shahrul drove.

On the way back that night as we were laughing and making jokes when suddenly Shahrul shouted. "OMG NAJJUA LIPAS BESAR!!!" and it was chaos!

I started shouting and holding on to Boo and Boo started shouting and clinging on to me and we were both off the seats and we were trying to get on top of each other. Boo sat on my ribs and smashed it. Wan suruh Shahrul stop kereta ke tepi but he kept driving in panic and holding on to Wan's arm. Basically try imagine 3 grownups in a MyVi jumping up and down with only two people trying to calm them down. It was a mess and the only sane and ones were Mashi and Wan who was like.. macamana nie?

Finally Shahrul stopped and all 3 of us.. Boo me and Shahrul got out and started flapping our clothes and screaming. They didn't find the roach and Mashi had to lie and said it went out. IT DIDNT WENT OUT. IT WAS IN THE CAR. HIDING. I COULD FEEL IT.

After we arrived at the law fac, I asked Shahrul to pop open the engine and check if it was hiding there. But we couldn't find it. We were exhausted and I ended up sleeping on Mashi's room eventhough I had my own. I was not going to drive in THAT CAR WITH IT!

Friday the 22nd February 2013

Mashi had to be my chauffeur because I was too scared to drive. I can't afford another brain freeze and stop in the middle of the road. So she drove and we picked up Shahrul. I said I wanted to go to a mechanic but he said Im being crazy. So we ended up going to a local car wash  The guy gave me a weird look but cleaned it anyway. HE DIDN'T FOUND IT. ITS WAR NOW. I even fought with Shahrul over the mechanic thing. I even forgot my best friends birthday until after I got home. Shahrul had to send me. This isn't an ordinary roach. IT IS SMART. INTELLIGENT. CUNNING. and its getting me into a lot of trouble with my loved ones.

SORRY FANA HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Sunday 24th February 2013

Haz and I went out to pick up my car at UM. I drove hers and she drove mine. Then she teman me steam the car because Abah cakap I should try and then to buy roach bait and cockroach spray. It is going down! I was almost convinced its not there until Haz said. " how long has it been" " erm 2-3 days" "hmmm..its still there. One roach sat in my hostel room for 6 months. You have to get it out" I was devastated. I can't drive with it!

So that night I sprayed my whole car with roach spray eventhough I just steamed it. I sprayed every hole nook and cranny. I sprayed until the whole car was drenched in it. I sprayed and pray. Then I went to sleep.

Monday 25th February 2013

I DID ITT!!!!! IT IS DEAD! I WENT TO CHECK ON MY CAR AND IT WAS AT THE BACK SEAT NEARING DEATH. I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT! I THOUGHT IT WENT OUT! BUT IT DIDNT! IM SMARTER THAN IT!! ITS UGLY CREEPY CRAWLY FEET  WERE UP AND JUST GASPING FOR LIFE. I WAS SO HAPPY I NEARLY CRIED.Relief is an understatement. All the hard work come to pay. Alhmadulillah I texted all my friends and they gave me hearty congratulations.

I shudder to think where it was hiding. and to think I was driving the whole time! aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

But Im in such a good mood that even my tutorial problems or Kak Ju making fun of me can't lower my soaring spirits!

 

 

 



So thats the story of IT. I want to thanks all my friends especially Mashi, Shahrul, Boo, Wan, Hazirah and Tasnim for helping me and accepting me for who I am :)

And i vow...

Never to eat in the car.
To leave drinks in the car.
To wash my car once a week regardless of the weather.
To always park in clean alleys.
And to love Kricket (thats my car's name..got the inspiration from Wawa) forevermore.

Conclusion

Never assume a roach is dead until YOU SEE IT.

oh well thats that. Im gonna go dye my hair purple and eat nachos and pina colada with Haz later. See you soon blog!